Saturday, June 27, 2015

When Dreams Change.

In the spring of 2009, I sat on my couch with a pencil and a piece of graph paper and began to dream.  I dreamt about the perfect house for our family.  I thought of every closet and bedroom.  Every need and want that we might have.  And I drew the house that I am sitting in right now.

There are a few differences with how it turned out, but all in all, my original design is a dream that we were able to realize.  It's pretty mind blowing actually.

As we built the house, our thought was that this would be our forever home.  We put the master on the main floor so that as we got old we could just live on the main floor.  This home would be where or kids would come back from college for me to do their laundry.  The place where we would record our grandkids' heights…

But after a few years, I began to realize that this house was a lot to manage.  More than I wanted to manage as we grew older.  And our dream began to shift.  Our new dream became living in this house until our kids were out of school.  The schools here are truly the best ones for academics in our area.  But once they were all out, we would live in a little home, just big enough for Anthony and I, and build a large family "farm" that we could use for family gatherings and weekends away and retreats for Anthony's work.

And then this last year we began to become more and more aware of what our family's needs are becoming.  How important living in a diverse area truly is for any family but particularly a transracial family like ours.  How much the level of wealth and "golden-spoon" mentality is something we are hugely uncomfortable with here.  How hearing our kids' friends see our house and say something about how much money we have, made us feel like we were missing the mark on how we desire to present ourselves.  How overwhelmed we truly are with the size of this house and how unnecessary all of this space really is.  How good schools are great, but the life lessons that come from the culture you live in are even more important.

So, we began to dream a little again.  A new dream.  A completely different dream.  A dream that would mean huge changes for our family.

I began poking around the internet.  I looked on and figured out which schools in our area were the most diverse and yet still provided a decent education.  (There are some seriously hurting schools in Kansas City.)  And I began to look at houses in those areas.  And I found a little gem and scheduled a showing, because, why not?

We drove up and I started crying.  We walked in and Anthony knew.  We got back in the car and said to each other, "Holy crap, we are going to buy another house."

And that is exactly what we have been doing this month.  We are buying this house because we just couldn't imagine not buying it even though we knew we wouldn't move into it right away.  We figured we could rent it for a few years and then try and move into it as a family.  We braced ourselves as we told our kids what we were planning.

AND THEY BLEW US AWAY.  They were so excited.  They had some questions and fears but they jumped right on board with us.  And we looked at each other and were like...

Crap.  We really are going to move.

We really are going to move our family there.  Into a house half the size of this one which I drew so carefully for my family.  Because our dream has changed and this new house is what is perfect for our family now.

It's going to be an adjustment.  And there are things that we need to do to rework the house to fit our family.  And we aren't going to move for two more years.  We may seem rash and crazy to others, but we are really thoughtful about all the decisions that we make and we knew that it wasn't something that we are ready to do today.  Part of this is because of school for the kids.  Middle school in our school district starts in 6th grade here.  For the new house, it is 7th.  We didn't want to have Adele or Elise go through a year of finishing elementary school only to go do another year there.  But in two years, Lucy will be going into 5th grade…it's the perfect window of time for us to make the jump.  Plus, we are cutting our household in half.  So the two years to plan and purge are much needed for me.

So we are renting it to some friends in the meantime as we prepare.  And they are just as excited about getting to live there for two years as we are to make it our new family home.  I mean, this house is truly a gem.

I can't wait to share this dream with you.  To bring you along as we figure out this new life for our family.  This house that we live in has been a true gift and we have loved living here despite some of the harder parts of it, but we are excited to have a new dream too.  Even if it seems a little crazy.

Friday, June 26, 2015


How is June almost over?!  This summer has been flying by like crazy.  I can't believe that we are nearing the end of June. This time next Saturday, Anthony and I will be driving the older girls to camp!

Anyway.  So, here's a quick glimpse at what we have been up to...

Adele's softball season is already over.

And she's begun doing middle school things.

I'm knee deep in adoption paperwork that needs to be renewed.

We've picked 38.5 pounds of blueberries!

And enjoyed some crazy good pie.

Anthony and I made a trip to Chicago.

And we have been enjoying some time at the pool.

We've been cleaning out the house.  (That's just some of the clothing donations!)

AND there is also one other MAJOR thing that has been going on, but I will save that for another post.  Ha!

Hope your summer is going well!!